I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Randomize
