your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
Randomize
