Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Randomize
