i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
