it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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