Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
Randomize