Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize