FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
you would pick up someone in the library
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I have surprise drugs for everyone
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
Randomize
