I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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