He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
Randomize