no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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