you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
