i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
how does that bad decision feel?
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize
