My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
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