I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Randomize
