Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
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