Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(404): View more from Georgia

what's for breakfast?

(678): View more from Georgia

Advil and throwup

Fav 19 1747 5891
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(306): View more from Saskatchewan

She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.

Fav 27 1398 8982
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(813): View more from Florida

Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.

Fav 22 1500 2110
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(61): View more from Australia

I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY

Fav 1 1811 953
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(201): View more from New Jersey

I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.

Fav 1 1743 974
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(708): View more from Illinois

State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.

Fav 3 623 587
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(503): View more from Oregon

Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.

Fav 1 404 150
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(608): View more from Wisconsin

Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.

Fav 0 54 46
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(317): View more from Indiana

Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end

Fav 0 37 43
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