He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
