at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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