You just made me feel so damn special
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize
