Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
We need a shit load of segways right now
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize