I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
