I heard we made out
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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