We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
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