that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
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