What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
I'm sobbing to NWA
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
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