You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
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