This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
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