I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
Randomize