Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
ttyl tear gas
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
Randomize