susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
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