I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Randomize
