wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
this must be what syphilis tastes like
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
Randomize
