I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Randomize
