How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Randomize
