Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
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