Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
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