Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Randomize