too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
There's a naked man in my car right now.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize
