I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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