did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
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