I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize
