i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Randomize
