There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
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