I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
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