He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Randomize
