If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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