my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
