just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
Randomize
