i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
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