Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
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