Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I have demons in me.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
Randomize
